Teenage Crushes
by peacock5
Summary: Lily has a serious crush that no one knows about. She also has another life that no one knows about. What happens when her crush finds out about her other life? LJ
1. Thoughts of Him

**A/N: I'm back, finally! It's actually been a few years, I'm done with high school, and I want to work on my creative writing skills again. I was a sophomore when I started this story, and I hope that my writing skills have improved at least a little bit since I began this story. I decided to revise this whole thing, but I'm not quite sure where I'm going with this anymore. We'll just see where this takes me… **

**And I still need ideas for pranks! **

**Disclaimer: I have never and will never own Harry Potter and I am not profiting from writing this little ficlet.**

**Teenage Crushes**

**Chapter 1: Thoughts of Him**

If love is pain, then why do we put ourselves through so much hurt?

I, Lily Marie Evans, am in love. I'm in love with a person who doesn't even know I exist. Most of my friends believe that I'm in love with Sirius Black, and since I have never contradicted them about that, they continue to think it. The truth is, I fell in love a long time ago, during my first year perhaps, and the boy, man now I suppose, didn't realize it.

Maybe I should've worn shorter skirts, or lower cut shirts, but I'm fine with who I am. I have never been a true "girly girl," and I used to be uncomfortable wearing anything that showed the slightest amount of skin. I never had much of a figure to deal with anyways, but happily, I developed over the summer, and my cousin treated me to a makeover for my 17th birthday.

I know I am at least pretty, some say beautiful, but I don't think I could ever live up to the woman _he _deserves. I've got a somewhat lithe and muscular body from years of Quidditch. My red hair and emerald eyes make me unique and allow me to stand out in a crowd, but my best friend Aubrey, the girl _he _is currently dating, is the perfect girl for _him_. She's absolutely gorgeous. Her long blonde hair, green eyes, and perfect body make me green with envy (although she says she's jealous of _my _looks!).

I idolize _him _to the point of obsession. I hide it well, though, and not even Aubrey knows. I don't stalk him or anything; mainly it's just that my thoughts are constantly on _him. _Ironically, I'm still the smartest witch at Hogwarts and destined to become Head Girl this year.

I even joined the Quidditch team to be closer to him. I was surprised at my talent for Chaser, since I had never played before tryouts. I became Gryffindor's Golden Girl last year, while _he _coincidentally became Gryffindor's Sex God.

I don't think anyone would believe that I'm not a virgin. The day Aubrey and _him _got together, I snuck out to a club in Hogsmeade and got drunk. Needless to say, I woke up beside an extremely hot naked man the next morning. I was shocked and embarrassed at first, but when he woke up, we started talking about the night before. He said I was surprisingly amazing in bed for it being my first time and being totally trashed.

My talents just seemed to keep popping out from nowhere. That was pretty much the only good thing about that day, losing my virginity to a stranger while being so drunk that I'll never remember the experience. Everyone says it's supposed to be amazing and special, but I guess life just happens sometimes.

I have a wild side. I'm not the naïve, innocent little Lily Evans that everyone thinks I am. I sneak out to go to clubs and pick up random, good-looking guys. I'm not ashamed to admit it. But I won't be called a whore or a slut. I don't dress slutty, nor do I act it. I believe that's what truly makes a girl a slut, not sleeping around.

I have differing opinions from other people, and I speak my mind. I'm rather independent, if I do say so myself (which I do). People can say what they will of me, and sometimes it irritates me, but I get over it quickly. I only hex them into next week as I have a reputation to maintain as a fiery red head.

I'm not going to lie and say boys don't drool over me, because they do. I guess I have my own attractive appeal. But those boys will never compare to _him. _Many of you are probably wondering by now, how can a popular guy like _him _not notice me?

Easy, I seem to sink into the shadows whenever he's nearby. My usual dynamic, energetic aura seems to fade away as soon as he gets within 10 feet of me. Who would notice a shy girl when you yourself are an energetic outgoing person? Now you're probably wondering, how has he not heard of you, or even pranked you yet? I have no answer to this question, perhaps I never will.

Being Head Girl this year is an upside to a rather depressing world I live in right now. I have no idea who the Head Boy will be, but I heard a rumor that starting this year, I'll have to share a common room and bathroom with him. We each get our own bedroom, though. That's good news. As long as the Head Boy isn't a Slytherin, especially Snape (we had an unfortunate fall-out when I discovered exactly how much influence that dastardly Lucius Malfoy had over him), I'll be okay. But tomorrow I have to wake up early and leave for Hogwarts, so maybe I'll continue telling my story later.

**A/N 2: Please tell me of any grammatical errors, or confusing sentences. I do tend to contradict myself, and constructive criticism is great! Hopefully I'll finally finish this story this year!**


	2. Thoughts on the Train

**A/N:**** So apparently, they completely changed how to upload chapters/stories since I've last updated, and it took me forever to figure it out! I almost gave up completely, but figured it out in the end. **

**Teenage****Crushes**

**Chapter 2: Thoughts on the Train**

I stepped onto the platform and glanced at my watch. Right on time to be early. If anybody was a perfectionist and had to be early to everything, I most certainly was. Normally most of our group was early too, and tended to beat me, but this year I was planning on being the first one on the train.

I entered the usual compartment that me, Aubrey, Allison (I'm the only L aren't I? Allison is my other best friend at Hogwarts), and the Marauders usually shared. I was greeted by Aubrey, Allison, Remus, and Peter, and was decidedly shocked. I was planning to be the first one there, but I was beaten by not only one, but FOUR people! "So much for being the first one here," I said aloud.

"Lily, when have you ever been the first one here?" Allison joked.

"I was planning on starting this year, especially since I'm Head Girl!" I explained, getting excited again about the thought of being Head Girl.

It had been my dream since I first learned I was a witch and read about Hogwarts in _Hogwarts, A History_. I had worked hard to attain my goal, always reading ahead and going the extra mile(s) on my homework. I constantly had to put up with the teasing and "bookworm" jokes just to get where I was now. If anyone deserved the Head Girl position, it was Lily Evans.

"Really? You got Head Girl? That's awesome! James got Head Boy, so now that my boyfriend and best friend are the Heads, I wonder how much stuff I can get away with?" she acted as though she thought about it for a second. "Oh! I know! Practically everything!"

"Hah, as if I'd let you get away with the stuff you pull. But knowing me, I'd probably be in on most of the stuff too."

"I also heard that you guys get to share your own common room. You have got to give me the password, I plan on spending a lot of time there," she added.

I went from being extremely excited and happy, to moody and angry in a flash. How dare she think she could spend most of her time in MY common room with _him_? I shudder to think about what she meant by spending a lot of time there.

It seemed as though she noticed my abrupt mood change and a confused and worried expression crossed her face. I put on a fake smile and chirped, "Well, I've got to head to the Heads' cabin since I'm late as it is, and Professor McGonagall wants to brief us on our Heads' duties. She'll have a heart attack if 'perfect, never late Lily Evans' is late. I'll get back to you on the password thing when I see you at the feast."

On my way there, I started about thinking about sharing a common room with _him. _What was I going to do? I can't share a common room, much less a bathroom with _him_. It's going to take a lot of self-control not to be a blubbering idiot around _him_ during the day, but almost all the time now? I was in for a difficult year.

But on the bright side, it was going to be a lot easier to sneak out at night. But as soon as I thought about nighttime and the common room I imagined what Aubrey and _him _would be doing in _his _room at night. I groaned, _Get_ _those images out of my head!_

And they did just that when I walked straight into a firm chest and fell on my butt. What lovely surprises I was starting my school year with. Learning _he _is Head Boy, thinking about whether or not _he _does the dirty in his relationship with Aubs, and now walking straight into a person, most likely a boy by the feel of the firm chest.

"Oh, I'm so sorry, I wasn't paying any attention to where I was going," I heard the voice that haunted my dreams say. Please don't tell me that the person I ran into was _him_! I looked up. Yup, it was. What a bloody fantastic morning. I started blushing profusely, and started wondering how much like a beet root I was looking.

I tried to calm myself down enough to say something. Thoughts were flying through my head at a rapid fire pace. Right, here it goes: "I should be the one apologizing, I ran into you!" I said in a voice that belied my inner turmoil.

_He _looked me over before saying, "You're Head Girl this year, aren't you? I'm pretty sure we're headed toward the same place. Why don't you walk with me, just so you don't run into any more people?" he joked.

I laughed and answered, "Yes." _He _actually knew that I was Head Girl! That meant _he _was paying at least some sort of attention to me. And here I was, running straight into _him _like an idiot.

I noticed on our way to the Heads' compartment that _he _was deep in thought. It gave me a chance to give _him_ a good going over. _His_ unruly jet black hair fell into _his_ almost turquoise colored eyes. _He_ had grown over the summer to be about 6'3", towering over my 5'7" frame. _His_ shoulders had also gotten broader, and _his_ muscles seemed more defined through _his_ tight muggle shirt. All in all, _he _looked like a delectable piece of meat.

When we reached the Heads' compartment, I saw _him_ look at _his_ watch, and I took the chance to look at it, too. Crap, we were ten minutes late. There's no way Professor McGonagall would let us get away with this one. Even though she liked me, she was still the strictest Professor at Hogwarts. When I saw that _he_ seemed to hesitate before going in, I took the initiative and went in first.

Professor McGonagall's hands were on her hips, and her foot was doing the impatient tapping thing that I was so fond of doing when I was starting to get severely annoyed. Her glasses were perched on the tip of her nose, and she was giving me the "you-better-have-a-good-excuse-for-being-late" look that she had given everyone except me in the past. (Remember, I'm never late, but that's not to say that Aubs and Allison never were.)

"Miss Evans, Mr. Potter," she nodded to each of us, never wavering in her glare. "I do hope that in the future you will be on time. What kind of an example will you be setting to your fellow students if you are late to a meeting with your Professor, no less? Much as I'd like to discuss this further, I'm rather pressed on time. I know you were sent a handbook along with your Hogwarts letter, so I'm going to make this rather brief."

I tuned her out after 15 minutes of non-stop lecturing. What she considered brief was in fact half an hour. As much as I love Transfiguration, that woman was a complete and total prude. I wonder if she had ever been shagged? I mean, she looks like she'd be happy dying an old spinster.

I started paying attention when Professor McGonagall looked like she was finishing up. _He _said politely as she left, "Have a nice train ride," but I could tell _he_ really didn't mean it. _He _hadlooked more bored than me, if that was possible, during her long speech. She glared at him in response as she made her way to wherever she was going.

I sat down on one of the plush couches that filled the huge cabin, and soon felt myself drifting off to sleep, only to be woken by _him _lightly shaking my shoulder and whispering, "We're going to be there in ten minutes. I think you should probably change into your school uniform now."

--

**A/N:** I think that starting out and setting up the plot is the most difficult thing ever! Luckily I haven't been hit with writer's block yet, but I can feel it creeping up on me. Next chapter will be the train ride from James' POV, definitely much longer than this chapter.

**Author's Note after editing and revising: **When I first started writing this chapter, I think I had it planned out to do something a little different than what it's turning out to be. I don't think it's bad, but I think I could do better. I'm leaving most of the story as is, but tweaking it a little here and there now. I've decided not to totally revamp it because that would take a lot more time and effort than I can handle right now, and I don't think what I wanted to change it to would work. But, good news, I reached 100 reviews today! Big thanks to all of you reviewers. I can't tell you how happy that makes me. It really does encourage me to keep on writing. (Okay, this is an addition to this note, reviewers are what made me come back! Thanks for that! I got a random review one day about a month ago, and it reminded me that I still had this story, and at least another few chapters planned out in my head. Right now, I'm just fixing mistakes and filling out the chapters a little bit, adding a few words and phrases here and there. And remember, constructive criticism is great!)


	3. Thoughts of Girls

**A/N: **Against my will, I have writer's block. I'm happy that I at least wrote this before then. Maybe the writer's block is due to the fact that teachers somehow have a secret agreement to all load homework on you at the same time? Who knows, but I'm updating sooner than I thought thanks to all those lovely reviews. 33! Wow! I thought it'd take forever to get 20, much less 33! Anyways, here's your next chapter. Oh, and I promise to make Lily go to the club soon.

**Teenage****Crushes**

**Chapter 3: Thoughts of Girls **

I was on my way to the Heads' compartment to meet Professor McGonagall, my least favorite teacher even though she WAS Head of Gryffindor, thinking of my relationship with Aubrey for what seemed like the hundredth time that week, when I collided abruptly with a red head.

I, being the gentleman that I am, helped her up while saying, "Oh, I'm so sorry, I wasn't paying any attention to where I was going," when we both knew it was her fault. Okay, I admit it may partially have been mine. I looked her over and noticed the Head Girl's badge pinned proudly to her robe. So this was Gryffindor's Golden Girl, the seemingly innocent, but fiery tempered, mind you, Lily Evans.

She was blushing, badly. "I should be the one apologizing, I ran into you!"

I looked her over again and shook off the thoughts of her amazing body. "You're Head Girl this year, aren't you? I'm pretty sure we're headed toward the same place. Why don't you walk with me, just so you don't run into anymore people?" I joked with her.

Company is always good, especially when you're about the face the teacher who hates you most, for no reason at all! Well, it could be from all the pranks the Marauders pull, but hey, they're funny, and she could use some lightening up. I swear, she just needs to be shagged one bloody good time and she would be in a wonderful mood for the remainder of my stay here at Hogwarts.

She laughed and answered, "Yes," then turned and started walking in the direction of the Heads' compartment.

I took the time during the walk to look my companion over. One word to describe her: absolutely bloody gorgeous. Okay, that was three, but you had to hand it to her, she was beauty and brains, with a temper, all rolled into one. And her body was practically flawless. All in all, a great combination, if a little overwhelming and scary at times.

Why hadn't I really noticed someone as gorgeous as her before, me being the self-proclaimed Sex God that I am? I guess I never really take the time to look at the wallflowers. I tend to see only those whose personalities stand out, which is why I really can't stand Peter all that much.

My thoughts turned to Aubrey at that. She was beautiful, had some intelligence, and was rather outgoing. So why did I not feel the way I was _supposed _to feel around her. All giddy and lightheaded and _in love,_ like you were supposed to feel about someone as great a catch as her. The relationship was fine, but I didn't want it to be. There was no _excitement_. If there's anything that I can't stand not having in my life, it's excitement. I live for it, to put it simply.

Living on the edge, doing that gets your adrenaline rushing through your body, that's what life is all about. Why live safely and conservatively? Where's the fun in that? I love doing things that could be dangerous and potentially life-threatening. That's why I love flying, and when I go to muggle London, I ride my very own Ducati, which is as much of a rush as you can get. You should do things that make you truly feel alive and appreciate everything that you've been given.

Which brings me back to Aubrey. We're just too much alike. True, she's hot and that's all a most men really look for in a woman, but there just is no chemistry, no passion, no sparks flying when I touch her. It'd been like this since two months after we started going out, and I can't even remember how long ago that was.

She's pretty much just like any other girl, not ever expecting to really getting to know the Great James Potter. I'm just like a trophy to go bragging and gossiping about to other girls. I can't even open up to Aubrey, and we've been dating for a while now. I'm hoping that I'll find someone different this year. Maybe I should break it off before she becomes more involved and I end up hurting her?

Girls are really too complicated to even be dealing with. They pretend that they're all into you, and just when you want the relationship to actually _go _somewhere, they close up. What's the point in leading you on, teasing you all the time? I should go celibate. But then, who would I have for company at night? My hand would really get old.

It's not as though I pressure them or anything, or just use them for their bodies. As soon as they say "no" or if I can tell that they aren't ready, then I stop.

Honestly, I'd like to think that there are more to girls than hot bodies. Well, in some cases, there really isn't anything more to them, but girls like Lily Evans, girls with brains and beauty, watch out! A guy could fall in love with a girl like her, if they aren't hexed to oblivion and beyond first.

I ask myself a lot, what do I want in a girl?

It goes without saying that beauty is at the top of the list, after all, the most attractive guy in Seventh Year deserves an attractive woman by his side, but intelligence is a must also. I don't like to hear chattering and gossip all the time, especially from girls that are _really _air-headed.

I want a girl that I can have interesting, thought-provoking conversations with. Talk in-depth about an arithmancy theory, or the wizarding economy, something other, _please_, than just who is shagging whom.

I want a girl who will stand up to me, or who will tell me when I'm doing something wrong, rather than agreeing with me or saying I'm right because they either are stupid and don't know that I'm wrong, or just want to make me happy by saying I'm right.

I want a girl who will tell me that I'm being an idiot when I'm acting like an idiot. Someone who will tell me that I'm being a jerk, or to grow up because I'm immature (although, the latter one with probably never happen, as I'll never stop being immature).

I want a girl that just being around her makes me feel good inside, like I'm actually worth something. Someone who can tell when I'm upset or when something is bothering me, even when it's not obvious, and honestly cares about my answer when I give it to her. And she'll do anything to see me happy again.

You're all thinking, wow, this is a new side to the Great James Potter, but honestly, I've always been like this. No one ever really thinks there's much of a serious side to the great prankster. I put up a show around people, making them think I'm just a cocky prat who chases after girls and beds them whenever I get the chance.

Well, I'm not. True, I'm pretty cocky, and I can be a prat (most of the time), so it's not really much of a show besides the always joking around and never caring part. I do care, more than most people think. It hurts to get insulted, but I never let it show and always laugh it off.

I have a sensitive side, not to say I always show it, but unlike most people, I can comfort well in times of pain. One of my many talents and abilities is my knack of empathizing with others, even when I've never been in their situation. My friends are really the only people who know about this side to me, which is why Peter worships me so much.

No one ever really gives me a chance, besides Sirius, Remus, and Peter. No girl ever wants to get to know me, they all just want to have a night with me then go and brag about it to their friends. I don't think I've ever really had a serious conversation with a girl before they start to flirt and try to seduce me. I'm just the Gryffindor Sex God to them, not James Potter.

Everyone thinks my life is perfect. (Now you're all going, when will he ever stop complaining? Hey, I'm just getting some things off my chest right now; I'm not looking for sympathy). I'm a wealthy pureblood who is dashingly handsome and gets good grades and all the girls.

The harsh truth is that no one is perfect, and don't ever think anyone or anything can be perfect. Everyone has insecurities, whether you notice it or not.

I'm scared of never going anywhere in life and not making my parents proud of me. I study to get good grades just for them. I'm also scared of never finding the right girl for me. I've never met a girl truly interested in me as a person with feelings.

Aubrey is great, don't get me wrong. I know I'm probably making her sound like this superficial bitch, but she's not. I'm just trying to say is that she doesn't GET me, like understand me, you know?

I was jolted out of my deep thoughts when we finally reached the Heads' compartment. The walk took less time than I thought it would. I looked at my watch before going in, and realized Lily and me were ten minutes late. Oh shit, Professor McGonagall is going to be pissed. I don't think I've met another person as strict as her. I braced myself before I followed Lily into the compartment.

Professor McGonagall had her hands on her hips and her foot was tapping the floor impatiently. Well, have at it then. I'm not going to wait all day for your tirade, I said to her, silently of course.

She had her glasses perched at the end of her nose, and she was giving us the "you-better-have-a-good-excuse-for-being-late" look. I really need to take a picture of her giving me that look one day, something to remember and laugh at when I'm old and nostalgic.

"Miss Evans, Mr. Potter," she nodded to each of us, not blinking an eye. "I do hope that in the future you will be on time. What kind of an example will you be setting to your fellow students if you are late to a meeting with your Professor, no less? Much as I'd like to discuss this further, I'm rather pressed on time. I know you were sent a handbook along with your Hogwarts letter, so I'm going to make this rather brief."

Brief, yeah right! She droned on and on for at least half an hour. Thankfully I tuned her out after the first five minutes. Man, that woman really needed to loosen up a little or get laid…

No, no! GET THOSE IMAGES OUT OF MY HEAD! I trembled at the image of Professor McGonagall shagging a man (or woman…). That last thought only brought on more images and I willed myself to think of something else.

This year would be the best year of all; especially considering it was my last year. The Marauders have so many pranks lined up to pull, and we'd be sure to go down in history as the greatest pranksters Hogwarts had ever seen. We even perfected our map that showed you where every person was in the whole castle.

I finally started paying attention again when Professor McGonagall starting saying her good-byes. What a relief! "Have a nice train ride," I said, not really meaning it but trying to be polite anyway. She just glared at me before walking off.

She's my Head of House, and she has it out for me! What is Hogwarts coming to?

Lily promptly sat down on one of the couches in the compartment, and I sat on the one opposite her. She fell asleep almost immediately, lulled by the gentle rocking motion of the train. She really seemed like she could be an incredible person once you got to know her, but too bad she was best friends with Aubs. It seemed like a bad idea to date your ex-girlfriend's (if I did break up with her) best friend.

Eventually, it was time to get into my school robes. I noticed that although Lily had her robe on, she had muggle clothes on under it. I gently shook her shoulder and whispered in her ear, "We're going to be there in ten minutes. I think you should probably change into your school uniform now." I ignored the pleasant shock and excitement I felt in touching her soft skin and left to find the rest of my gang.

--

**A/N:** Yes, another chapter done. I'll try to update as soon as possible. I know it looks like it's moving a little too fast, but I promise, they aren't getting together this soon in this little fic. By the way, mrsjesspotter, I tried to convert the inches into meters, and somewhere I went wrong because she ended up being really tall? If anyone could, please tell me how to convert it, and go ahead and do it for me, maybe, too. (Lily's 5'7" and James is 6'3".)

**Author's note after revising: This is turning out to be easier than I thought, mostly because of ditching the whole revamping idea. Just going through and adding some things, taking out others, and fixing grammatical mistakes. My chapters are so short, but I have no idea what to add to make them longer, hopefully when I start writing new chapters, I'll just try and make them longer.**

**I STILL NEED IDEAS FOR PRANKS! PLEASE, IF YOU HAVE ANY SUGGESTIONS, LET ME KNOW! My e-mail is crazyxbeautifylAThotmailDOTcom.**


	4. Thoughts of Sirius

**Disclaimer: No, I do not own anything related to Harry Potter or J.K. Rowling. I do own the plot and the original characters.**

**A/N:** I apologize for taking so long. I didn't think it would take this long, I only thought maybe a week? I ended up joining track, so now I have something to do every night of the week and soccer tournaments on the weekends. Someone did give me the measurements for their heights, but silly me deleted the e-mail, so maybe I'll get it next time. Thanks for all of you who reviewed, it really helped me get off my lazy butt and write. (Some of you are probably thinking, lazy? She runs track, plays select soccer and is in the Swing Club, but yes, I am lazy.)

**Teenage Crushes**

**Chapter 4: Thoughts of Sirius **

The trip to the castle was quiet, seeing as how I had to share a carriage with _him_, and we both seemed to be caught up in our thoughts. The silence wasn't one of those awkward silences though, where you're fumbling for something to say, and what you come up with doesn't ever seem like a good idea to talk about.

The hall was already full by the time we got there. I quickly grabbed a seat between Aubrey and Allison, who were quite conveniently sitting across from the Marauders. _He _sat opposite Aubrey and diagonal to me.

Ah, the torture that my lovely, awesome, great best friends put me through.

As I sat down, I realized Allison, like the rest of us, had really changed over the summer. Her once frizzy midnight hair now hung straight and smooth halfway down her back. Her clear blue eyes were the same as always, though, but now they were set off by her summer tan. I sighed, while others got darker during the summer, I somehow managed to only get paler with a couple more freckles popping up on whatever skin was exposed to the sun.

The three of us, well, two not counting Aubrey since she was taken, would most definitely be the most sought after girls this year.

Allison and Aubrey simultaneously looked at Sirius, who was talking animatedly to _him_, then back at me. Great, they still thought I liked Sirius. No doubt they'd pressure me into dating him this year, especially with my newfound looks. Well, he could be my ticket to getting closer to _him_.

Sirius was a bit of a womanizer. I take that statement back: he definitely _was _a womanizer, and that's an understatement. Once in a while, he'd actually settle down with a girlfriend for maybe two weeks, which wasn't that often. He did look very good, I had to hand it to him, and he knew how to put the looks and charm to use.

Allison leaned over and whispered in my ear, "When are you going to tell Sirius you like him, or do we have to do that for you?"

Shocked didn't even begin to cover it. "You wouldn't dare," I hissed back.

Big mistake. I regretted the words as soon as they came out of my mouth.

If there's one thing you didn't do in our little group, it was make a dare. We were the craziest trio of girls at Hogwarts, and we accepted practically ever dare. The dares we didn't accept were the ones known to be impossible, but not after spending hours poring over tomes in the library, looking for a way to carry it out and make it possible.

She got a very evil smile on her face. "Oh, I accept your dare."

Crap, I really shouldn't have said that. Now I was in for it.

There was nothing I could do now except wait for the inevitable. She would tell Sirius, _he _would find out, and there was now no chance at all for a relationship with _him_.

Life was getting better all the time.

(And that previous statement was _definitely_ sarcastic, in case you didn't catch it.)

-

Professor Dumbledore stood up at that moment since the first years were finally finished being sorted. He said the usual introductions (the Forbidden Forest is forbidden- looking at our group in particular while saying that- and introducing _him_ and me, etc.) and seemed about to end the speech when he thought the better of it and added, "Dark times are coming upon us. I want each of you to do what you believe is right and think of the consequences of your actions. I must also insist that you consider staying here for the holidays; it is not necessary, but considering your personal safety, it would be a better idea. Now, I am famished, and I can tell and hear that some of you are, so let the feast begin!"

The Slytherins seemed amused by this last part and whispered quietly among themselves. Big surprise there. The only person who seemed to be seriously considering Dumbledore's words was _him_. He sat quietly in thought, like most of the train and carriage ride there. Wow, that must be so exciting, always caught up in your thoughts, and never being able to notice what is going on around you. I snorted, at least I wasn't nearly as caught up this year as I was last year.

Unfortunately, Aubrey heard the snort. It was rather louder than I intended. "What's up?" she asked.

"Nothing, just thinking about the Slytherins' reactions to Dumbledore's speech."

"Yeah, I noticed their reactions, too. They're all probably going to join that evil guy and help him. They're just a bunch of pureblooded gits."

I laughed at that. She was right. All those Slytherins seemed to care about was your bloodline. I usually got teased a lot for being a mudblood, but ironically, somehow, against all their beliefs of me having an inferior upbringing and having no magical background, I was a better witch than all of them put together.

Modest, aren't I?

When I was finally done stuffing myself with the delicious elf-made food (you couldn't _get_ food this good in the muggle world), I muttered something along the lines of having to see Professor McGonagall about the Heads' dorms and left.

I wasn't that surprised, really, to find _him_ following me. And I certainly wasn't surprised to find myself suddenly nervous with butterflies in my stomach, either. I had gotten used to the feeling over the years, which demanded that I become a master at hiding my emotions. Fortunately, I did become a master at it, so _he _never knew how _he _made me feel.

Professor McGonagall must have seen us get up and decided to wait for us just outside the Great Hall. "Mr. Potter, Miss Evans, I suppose you'll be wanting to know where your rooms are. Just follow me." She took off at that, not even glancing back to see if we were following.

She led us through a series of halls and stairs and more halls. She finally came to a stop in front of a portrait of a young girl, maybe six or seven, who was in a field of flowers that looked like lilies. I smiled slightly at this.

"This, of course, is going to be your rooms for the rest of the year. The password is going to be Jupiter's Lightning until you decide to change it. I expect you to turn in early tonight, seeing as how you two have classes in the morning." Again, she took off without looking back.

_He _muttered the password and walked in, me following closely behind. The sight took my breath away. The common room was absolutely gorgeous, decorated in all red and gold. It was roughly the same size as the Gryffindor common room, with red and gold couches and armchairs. The rug underneath my feet was red with gold trim and a gold Gryffindor insignia in the middle and over the fireplace hung a tapestry with the Gryffindor lion on it. I looked up to see a huge chandelier that was literally breathtaking.

There was a main staircase that went up about ten steps before splitting in two. I took the staircase on the right because it led to the door with Lily Evans, Head Girl engraved on it. With such an extravagant common room, I think you can guess what my bedroom looked like.

The walls in my bedroom were beige to even out all the red and gold. My bed was a huge four-poster with a canopy on it with sheer gold hangings. The duvet on the bed was a maroon color, and the sheets were gold. The pillows varied between the two colors. All the furniture in the room was mahogany. I saw a door to the left and opened it.

The bathroom was everything a girl could ever dream for. The bathtub was the size of a pool, and the shower looked as if four people could comfortable take a shower without getting too close. It even had two showerheads on opposite walls, so you could get twice the amount of water and pressure. I walked up to the bathtub and saw that it had buttons for various types of bubbles and scents.

Almost everything was done in white marble and silver in the bathroom, as if to make up for the red and gold everywhere else. The rugs in here were white, with smatterings of silver. There were two separate sinks, one for me and one for _him._ I decided to take the one on the right, since my room was closest to it and with a flick of my wrist, all of my make-up and toiletries were set-up in an organized fashion on the counter.

Being Head Girl definitely had some props, including being able to go to Hogsmeade whenever I wanted, provided, of course, that I was back by curfew. A curfew was meant to be broken, and I tended to break it… a lot. Thank goodness tomorrow was Friday and that meant some fun, but I couldn't spend the night anywhere considering what my friends and other students would think if I went missing.

I sighed. I still was and always would be naïve, innocent little Lily Evans to them. They would be shocked and horrified to find out what I did for fun on the weekends, but they didn't have to know, now did they? Some secrets were best kept secret.

-

After unpacking, I decided to go visit my old dorm and room. Aubrey and Allison were in there, giggling about something or other. "Come on! We have got to go talk to Sirius. Don't worry, we already told him that you liked him. I think he wants to ask you something," Allison said when she noticed I had walked in.

I knew I would regret that dare.

So I just nodded and followed them back down the stairs to the common room. Sirius, Remus, Peter and _him_ were in the corner, probably thinking up a new prank. "Sirius!" Aubrey called. "Look, we brought her!"

Oh, bloody hell.

And I never use those words unless I'm really meaning it.

All four of them looked up. _He _looked confused, as though he had just now heard about it. "Oh, great, excuse me for a second, Prongs, Moony, Wormtail."

He started to go to a different, secluded corner of the room. I didn't follow him immediately, and Allison finally had to give me a little shove.

Great, just great. Bloody fucking hell.

Sirius seemed nervous. Well, that was a first. "Soo… I heard that you like me?"

I couldn't do anything but nod my head. I have this thing with saying no to guys. I really can't because I feel so guilty turning them down. I don't like making people feel bad.

He scratched the back of his head then ran his hand through his hair, something that reminded me of _him. He _had a tendency to run his hand through his hair whenever he was upset or nervous or frustrated.

And I was going to hook up with Sirius while I was still obsessed with _him._ I couldn't do that to Sirius, but I just can't say no.

"So, do you wanna like, go to Hogsmeade with me this weekend or something?" Sirius asked.

I smiled and said, "Sure, that sounds like fun," in a terribly fake voice, but he didn't notice.

"Cool," he said.

I had to get out of there. NOW.

"Well, I need to go study. I guess I'll see you tomorrow. Good night," I smiled again and stood up on tiptoe and kissed his cheek for effect. The excuse was foolproof, they honestly still thought I was a bookworm, which I was, but I didn't study ALL the time. I wasn't that much of a loser. The way I pulled it off, though, I think I might just have to take up acting; it'd be a pretty good profession for me.

I said my good nights and headed back to my common room, changed into my pajamas. That night I lay awake for a long time, thinking about Sirius.

-

A/N: This is the longest chapter yet, and I think they're just going to get longer. It's a lot easier now since I've got the basics down. Right now I'm swamped with projects (THREE IN ONE CLASS!) one big research project to do, so that kinda sucks. I also got majorly injured in soccer, so… yeah, that pretty much says it all. Thanks to all you reviewers, special thanks to lorett for such a long review. I promise to update as soon as possible.

**A/N 2:** Wow, it's been such a long time since I've done anything with this story, that I don't even know what I'm talking about in my previous A/N's. Very sad. I'm sorry for leaving you all hanging for so long!


	5. Thoughts of a Menace

**A/N:** I'm back! I'm going to try to update weekly now. It might not be the same day every week, but it will be within a week. I didn't do it this time, but now I'm going to write ahead a little bit more.

Another thing, Lily is not innocent as in she's a goody too shoes all the time, not doing anything daring (even though most people don't know that she does those dares). She is innocent in love and such, mainly because I'm making her having dated and kissed one person that her friends know of. I'm sorry I did not make this clear in the beginning, but now I am.

This is James' POV, btw.

**Teenage Crushes **

**Chapter 5: Thoughts of a Menace**

Today was not a very good day for me.

I was caught up in my thoughts all day, and I couldn't get out of the tangled webs that was my inner turmoil.

At least the silence in the carriage wasn't an awkward one, just comfortable. The silence was absolute in the carriage, but neither of us seemed to mind it. It's not often where you can have a comfortable silence with anyone, much less a girl, so I let myself become consumed with my thoughts again.

This was my last year, and I wanted to be remembered. I wanted to be finished with classes and sexually deprived professors, but I didn't want to leave the safe confines of Hogwarts Castle. I knew what was out there in the real world. A bloodthirsty maniac who lived to kill muggles and muggleborn witches and wizards. A crazy man who somehow gathered followers to do his bidding. A halfblood himself, he was gathering pureblood followers who wanted to kill everyone _but _purebloods.

I was not prepared to face the Dark Lord and his depraved minions, but face it I would. I would die to protect my friends, my neighbors, and even strangers. I wasn't going to shy away from danger. I would stand up and face it. This year, I was going to throw myself into preparing myself for the upcoming war. Too many people were oblivious to the danger that awaited them once they finished school. They simply refused to see the danger right in their face.

I was one of the few who understood what lay outside the confines of Hogwarts' walls.

And that was a chilling and scary thought.

-

We were obviously one of the last carriages to get there since the hall was already full when Lily and I walked in. I slid into the seat next to Sirius, who seemed to be the only other one besides Remus who _really _knew of the menace in the wizarding world.

"Prongs, old buddy, nice of you to finally join us! You barely even talked to us on the train!"

I grimaced. I had been far too held up in my thoughts to even bother to go back to their compartment. "Sorry, I was a little bit caught up in my thoughts today. Does anyone really even _know_ what's outside these walls? It seems to me that they're completely unaware of it all, except Dumbledore of course. I don't even think they even _want_ to see what's going on. Everyone's just turning a blind eye to all these deaths, all these wizards converting to the dark side."

Sirius knew of it because his family was deeply involved with Lord Voldemort. Luckily, he wasn't like the rest of his family and ran away last summer and was living with me now.

"Well, you know people just don't like to acknowledge anything other than what concerns them at the moment. They refuse to notice anything that might be a threat to them, passing it off as something that can dealt with only when it gets out of control."

We had talked about this on several occasions before, so of course Sirius knew the answer right away. But, we had yet to speak of more pressing matters. "So what's on the prank list for this year?" I asked.

"Well, Snivellus could always use a good washing to get all that grease out of his hair, but that's been done hundreds of times already. I say we prank the whole Slytherin class. But the question is how?"

"We need to make it so no one can remove it for about a week, too."

"Should we dye their skin Gryffindor colors?" Sirius proposed. It was a great idea, but the question was, had we done it yet. We'd done so much to the Slytherins that I can't even remember all of them.

"Have we done it yet?" I voiced my thought out loud.

"No, I don't think so, but let's ask Moony to make sure though," he suggested.

"Moony!" we both called at the same time. "Have we dyed the Slytherins' skins Gryffindor colors yet?"

"No, but that sounds like a great idea."

"Good, let's get the details later in the common room since the first years are finished sorting."

Professor Dumbledore stood up at that moment. He made the traditional speech, before adding, "Dark times are coming upon us. I want you to do what you believe is right and think of the consequences of your actions. I must also insist that you consider staying here for the holidays; it is not necessary, but considering your personal safety, it would be a better idea. Now, I am famished, and I can tell and hear that some of you are, so let the feast begin!"

I hoped that since Dumbledore pretty much shoved reality under the other students' noses, that they would realize the threat, but no, most of them just shrugged it off and began eating. The Slytherins even looked amused! The nerve of them! They were the ones who were siding with that Voldemort bastard, mostly because they were arrogant and devious and conniving bastards who thought they had superior blood. What a bunch of shit that whole blood thing was. I was a pureblood, but I didn't think I was any better than any muggleborn or halfblood. They would get what was coming to them in the end.

The Slytherins reactions didn't trouble me nearly as much as everyone else's. But, sooner or later, they would see. They would see the chaos, the destruction, the murder. Then, they would believe.

But then I heard Aubrey asking Lily "What's up?" after Lily snorted rather loudly. And Lily's response made me feel hope again. "Nothing," she had replied, "just thinking about the Slytherins' reactions to Dumbledore's speech."

Someone besides us three in the Marauders knew what was happening! Well, her response didn't actually mean she understood the threat, but I could see it on her face that she understood. A miracle! Lily was teased a lot for being a mudblood, but she was more talented than all of them put together. They looked down their noses at her, but she one-upped them in class every day, showing her true skills as a witch. I had a lot of respect for her, especially for not letting the gits put her down.

When she got up and left, muttering something about having to see Professor McGonagall about the Heads' dorms, I decided to follow her. After all, I needed to know where the dorms were, too.

Professor McGonagall met us just outside the Great Hall. "Mr. Potter, Miss Evans, I supposed you'll be wanting to know where your rooms are. Just follow me." She took off at that, not even glancing back to see if we were following.

She led us through a series of halls and stairs and more halls. She finally came to a stop in front of a portrait of a young girl who was in a field of flowers that looked like lilies. I saw Lily's slight smile at the picture, and started to grin a little, too.

"This, of course, is going to be your rooms for the rest of the year. The password is going to be Jupiter's Lightning until you decide to change it. I expect you to turn in early tonight, seeing as how you two have classes in the morning." Again, she took off without looking back.

I shook my head before saying the password. What a sexually deprived bitch! Honestly, she needed to get laid. Man, how I wished she would finally get over herself and fall in love with Dumbledore. Any fool with eyes could tell she was resisting her feelings towards him, finding it wrong to fall in love with the Headmaster.

The common room was lavish, but not much better than my own mansion. It was decorated mostly in red and gold, with a huge crystal chandelier hanging from the ceiling. Lily seemed to be in awe of this room. She looked rather beautiful, standing there, her mouth slightly open, her eyes bright as she took in everything, and her breath coming in deep, ragged breaths.

I walked up the main staircase, and took the staircase on the left when it split in two, seeing the plaque with my name engraved on it on the door to the left.

The bed in my room was twice as large as the bed at my house, with twice as many pillows. Again, the room was done in all red and gold with beige walls. The room had a definite masculine feel to it, though; I assumed it was similar to Lily's, just with the masculine feel thing. I walked into the bathroom next.

It was different from everywhere else, being done in white marble, with some silver touches. Both the bathtub and shower were huge, and could fit more than one person. Little wonder who I'd bring here. It should be fun, though.

Being Head Boy definitely had some benefits.

-

"Moony, have you got the book?" I asked. I had joined the other Marauders in the Gryffindor common room after unpacking and all. I knew house elves should do that, but I find it oddly soothing to unpack. A girl thing, I know, but still, it calms me. I was now sitting in a secluded corner, working on our next prank.

Remus pulled out the little black book that contained all of the pranks since year two. We carefully recorded every single prank pulled, even those that the professors still hadn't solved. They always immediately suspected us, but most pranks they couldn't prove that it was in fact the Marauders who pulled the prank. We were only caught when we wanted it to be known for certain that we had pulled the outrageous feat. If this book should ever fall into the wrong hands, I have little doubt that the Marauders would be no more.

"Got it," he said before flipping through the pages. He spent a couple of minutes, briefly reviewing the contents. "Nope, we haven't dyed the Slytherins' skin Gryffindor colors yet. I think we changed their robes one time, but I'm confident that we haven't pulled this prank yet."

"Should we dye their hair too?" Sirius suggested.

"Why not?" I countered.

"Great, now, how are we going to make it last a week?"

"We'll have to find a spell."

"That means research."

"Moony, you up to it?"

"Pretty sure I am," Moony answered. All of this was said in rapid-fire whispers. We didn't want others to know of the prank before we pulled it. It was bad luck.

At that moment, Aubrey yelled, "Sirius! Look, we brought her!" and started walking towards us with Allison close behind and Lily slightly lagging, looking as if she'd rather be anywhere but here.

I was slightly confused, not knowing why Sirius would want Lily.

"Oh, great, excuse me for a second, Prongs, Moony, Wormtail, I've got some business to attend to" Sirius said with a wink before getting up and walking to another secluded corner. Lily didn't follow immediately, still looking as if she'd rather be anywhere but here. She finally followed Sirius after Allison gave her a small shove.

"Why does Sirius want Lily?" I asked, still slightly confused.

"Oh, you didn't hear? She likes him, and I told him so right before you got here." Allison answered.

"Did she want you to tell him?" I questioned, seeing that mischievous gleam in her eye.

"Nope. But she dared me to." Allison said with a mischievous grin now on her face.

That explained it then. Not many people knew, but that group of girls accepted almost every dare. The only ones they didn't accept were the ones that'd be proven impossible, but they still spent hours in the library, looking for a way to act it out.

I watched Sirius and Lily closely, because for some reason, I was having a bad feeling in the pit of my stomach. Lily didn't seem to be saying much, which pleased me for some reason. I wondered why I hadn't known that she liked him, but I was often not informed of such things.

I was always left out of things like that. I really don't know why. But it was how our group worked.

Aubrey sat in my lap at that moment and said, "Get out of your thoughts, silly, it's time to relax now," before claiming my lips in a kiss. I sighed into her lips, beginning to relax for the first time today.

I stole another glance at Sirius and Lily and my breath caught when Lily leaned up and kissed him on the cheek, which wasn't very far considering her height. I felt… jealousy… and envy? Where were these emotions coming from? I didn't want to think about it anymore, so I pulled Aubrey into another kiss.

Lily came back over to us while I was still puzzling out my emotions. "Well, guys, I think I'm going to turn in. I have to do some more studying," she said, sounding like the usual Lily Evans bookworm, but this time, I noticed something else. I could tell she really didn't intend to study. She just wanted to get out of there.

For once, I really saw Lily. I mentally peeled away the guards she carefully put up. She had a secret, I could tell. She also probably hadn't told anyone of this secret. Secrets were a terrible burden, and this one was eating her up. She needed to be found out and soon, and I intended to do just that.

"Well, I think I'm going to turn in, too. You guys have to see my rooms later. They're wicked awesome. The password is Jupiter's Lightning. Knock first before you come in, though," I said, yawning for effect, then leaning down and kissing Aubrey good night.

Every teenager has had some experience with acting. You're not a true teenage unless you've lied convincingly.

I took my time strolling back to my room, checking old classrooms and broom closets along the way for any "stragglers" since it was getting close to curfew. I wanted to take being Head Boy seriously, and contrary to what most people thought, I could actually handle responsibility.

I finally reached the Heads' dorms and said the password to the young girl. The common room was empty. I walked up to my room and stripped down to my boxers, and as I lay in bed that night, thinking of the menace, and to my surprise, of Lily Evans.

-

**A/N: **I don't like that chapter. I don't think it's good at all. I was a bit rushed writing it, though. Flame away, if you want. I'll take my time a little bit more.. I'll try to update ASAP. Btw, anyone have any recommendations for good Lily/James or Hermione/Blaise stories?

Thanks again.

**A/N 2: **One more chapter to revise, then I can get started writing the next one! Exciting, right? Please, keep reviewing, it makes my day and encourages me to write more, especially since I get them straight to my phone. Love it! I wasn't going to revise and maybe start on the next chapter, except I got a lovely review from 1bigromantic, and I decided to keep on trudging.


	6. Thoughts of Perfection

**Disclaimer: **You know it by now. I own nothing but the plot and any unfamiliar characters.

**A/N: ****Yes, I'm back finally. Once again, thanks to all of you lovely reviewers. This is my first fanfic, so I'm sorry if the chapters are too short or I'm not updating fast enough. I don't know what took me so long, because it wasn't just writer's block, and I think I got insecure after reading so many fanfics better than mine. **

**A/N 2: This chapter has the MOST changes out of every other one. I recommend re-reading this one, if you haven't already.**

**Teenage Crushes **

**Chapter 6: Thoughts of Perfection**

The club.

A place that inspires freedom with just two words

The one place everyone goes where they can get away from his or her life for just one night. No one knows you there, and if they do, they don't care. It doesn't matter how important or unimportant you are, how much money you have, how nice your house is. You don't remember the last fight you had, the last mess up. You don't remember that the person you thought you loved cheated on you. You don't remember anything in your real life. It's just you and the music and the person you're dancing with. Then, you go home when you're exhausted, back to your boring and drab life.

I discovered this amazing world the day Aubrey and _him_ got together. I couldn't put up with it anymore.

To be honest, I'm surprised I didn't discover it sooner. And from that day forth, that world became my second life, my _secret _life. It was my discovery, my secret, my possession, and I guarded it as though I was guarding the largest treasure on earth. Because it was my treasure, my little island of escape.

Sixth year I would have probably been classified as clinically depressed. I contemplated suicide every other night. The nights I didn't think about suicide, I cried myself to sleep. I couldn't ever get really and truly happy. It seemed as though the beautiful things in my life always morphed into something gray and ugly.

People began to consider me antisocial since I always walked around with my nose in a book and refused to make conversations with anyone.

Really, I buried myself in books to get away from it all.

But what was I trying to get away from?

The idea of perfection, the idea of the perfect person everyone expected me to be, or so I thought. I felt people placed expectations on me, mocking or teasing me when I didn't do better than everyone else. Everyone thought I was perfect.

Of course, in real life, barely anyone thought I was perfect. They knew people made mistakes, but I was so caught up with trying to be whom I thought everyone expected me to be, that I didn't realize it.

No matter how hard I tried, I wasn't able to become perfect.

Perfection is a deadly thing. It eats you up, devours your mind and soul until you are no longer human. You are consumed by the idea of it, the very notion of being perfect, and always trying to be the ideal person. You no longer lived in the real world, instead you were off in a fantasy land all your own.

But it wasn't a fantasy. It was a nightmare, waiting to devour you at every opportune moment. It waited and stalked and lurked in the shadows, seeking for the smallest opening in your walls. And slowly the openings would become larger, and more frequent, until finally there was no wall left, just you left to the mercy of that unreal monster that is perfection.

And the struggle to become perfect was worse than the actual thing. You are deathly afraid of failure, and getting anything less than exceptional was absolutely not acceptable. You constantly think about what other people think about you. Do they consider this to be the absolute best, or this? Am I being who they want me to be? Questions and doubts continually running through your mind, you throw yourself into work, never stopping.

And it slowly but surely takes its toll, but some people will fade faster than others.

I began to be consumed by the monster perfection. Books were no longer a safe haven any longer. The release I found in Quidditch no longer helped. I was starting to become a person that deep down, I didn't want to be. I was my own worst enermy.

I hated it. I hated myself. I hated my drive to be perfect. I hated perfection itself.

Then Aubrey and _him_ got together. That was all it took. I slipped on my shortest skirt and tightest tank top (it wasn't nearly as slutty as you think, I wore long skirts and loose shirts then) and apparated to a club I had heard just opened in London.

It was bloody fantastic. I started grabbing drinks and downing them, losing my inhibitions before I dared to step onto the dance floor. I lost myself in the rhythm pulsing through my body. It was intoxicating how the sweaty mass was moving the same beat, the same rhythm. I danced until around two, when I met the man who deflowered me.

I had danced with him for a couple of songs before he asked if I wanted to go to his flat. Of course I did. And there I found another, even better release.

Sex. Shagging. Fucking. Whatever you want to call it.

It felt so good to get away from everything. I didn't need to be perfect anymore. I didn't care what others thought of me. For once, I was just myself. It was great.

No, not just great, bloody fucking brilliant.

I became a regular to clubs, needing the release it could bring to me. The thrill of it all intoxicated me. I would no longer be able to live if I could no longer go to the clubs. It was a part of me no one else knew about. My secret life.

--

Friday morning found me excited, knowing I would once again find the release I so craved that night.

Allison, the observant one, noticed this and asked, "Why are you so happy this morning? It's not that great to get back to classes."

Ah, the endless excuses bookworm tendencies gave you. Little did they know, I wasn't nearly as much of a bookworm as I was last year. I just shrugged and said, "This is my home. I missed being here. I'm not excited about the classes; I'm excited about being back."

The rest of breakfast was almost uneventful except that I discovered we had double Potions with Slytherins first thing. Oh joy. I don't necessarily hate the Slytherins, but they all seemed to hate me because of my "impure" blood.

There was one Slytherin whom I truly enjoyed talking to. He was quiet and intellectual, but seemed to never really care about his hygiene. His name was Severus Snape.

I am one of the few people who actually know that he is, in fact, not a pureblood. His mother was a pureblood, but his father was a muggle. He shunned the muggle side of him, though, and pretended he was pureblooded.

The Marauders seem to think that it's "great fun" to tease Severus all the time. That's one of the things I detest about them, the fact that they tease those that they think are beneath them, when in actuality, they are the ones who are of lesser value (well, only when they are teasing those persons).

The day passed quickly enough, and I earned 30 house points for Gryffindor. I was in good spirits when I started to get ready for the club.

I had just finished taking my shower when I heard a knock on the portrait. "Come in!" I yelled, but no one came in. I walked to the door, but right as I was just about to open it, Aubrey and Allison burst through the door.

"'ello my ducky!" Aubrey drawled, but then rushed on. "What are you doing tonight? Wanna do something with us? Why'd you just take a shower? Can you help me do my Potion's essay?"

"Whoa, whoa," the deluge of questions made my brain malfunction for a second. "One question at a time, please."

"Okay then. What are you doing tonight?" Aubrey queried.

"I am catching up on some homework then turning in early," I couldn't think of anything else, and I knew I was about to get trapped.

"Why so boring ALWAYS? You need to live it up a little, my friend. Hang out with us tonight! Please! See, I'm on my knees begging you!" to my amusement, she actually got on her knees and assumed the "begging" position.

If only she knew how much I was going to live it up tonight, then I wouldn't look so much like a bookworm. But I still needed that bookworm façade, or else… or else… I don't know. I just wouldn't know what to do without it.

"I really do need to do all that homework. I'm taking all those advanced classes this year, and all the teachers are just piling it on. I promise I'll hang out with you tomorrow night."

She sighed. "All right, c'mon Allison, let's go have fun by ourselves."

I jumped. Allison had been so quiet through the whole exchange that I had totally forgotten that she was there. I looked at her now and she was looking at me thoughtfully, and that's never a good thing.

You see, when she gets in her thoughtful moods like this, she'll brood all night, and then the next day, she'll sit one of us down and give us a heart to heart about what she thinks we're doing wrong, or what has upset her, or something along those lines.

I don't like those talks. At all. I dread it, in fact, and avoid them if at all possible.

She seems to have this extra sense that enables her to tell when we're lying or hiding something. And believe me, I have a lot to hide.

"Good night. Have fun!" I tried to sound as though I wanted to go with them, but was holding myself back. I think I pulled it off quite well, because they seemed convinced and said, "Sorry you can't hang out with us tonight. You better keep your schedule open for tomorrow night! Good night!"

After they left, I breathed a sigh of relief, and continued to get ready. I put on these black, loose pants that look as if they're a skirt and a green halter-top with black high heels that had green gems on them.

I applied light makeup that wouldn't smudge with sweat, and kept my hair loose and slightly curled.

And finally, it was time to go to the club.

--

**A/N: So, finally done with Chapter 6. Hopefully Chapter 7 will not take me nearly as long to do. Reviews will be nice.**

**Thanks again to the reviewers!**

**A/N 2: Eek, time to actually write a new chapter! Honestly, I still don't know what I should make James do for this day, as he appears not at all in this chapter. I think I'm going to tackle it tomorrow, and hopefully, the new chapter SHOULD be up by Sunday night. **


	7. Author's Note!

**Author's Note:**

**I AM STARTING TO REVISE AND WRITE AGAIN FOR THIS STORY.**

**So you can be happy now :)**

**I've revised up through Chapter 3.**

**Hopefully, a new chapter will be up sometime soon. Life is busy for me. You can read my author's notes for chapter 1 (and the second one for chapter 2) which explains why I've started again. But be looking for the new chapter… I think I may go back and start revising chapter 4 now.**

**Thanks for sticking with the story! I Love you Reviewers!**


	8. Thoughts of a Prank

**A/N: **Oh dear me, am I actually updating? I do believe I am! I wanted to get this out before I decided to start on this little one shot involving multiple partners and a big fantasy of mine. It'll be smut-ilicious, I promise you.

And again, James' POV, for those of you who haven't noticed that I switch POV's every time.

BTW, do you like that I say it from both points of view? Or would you rather have it all mixed in one chapter, and probably only Lily's POV. A reviewer complained about the redundancy of it all, but I rather like showing the thoughts. But if enough people don't like it, then I won't do it.

**Teenage Crushes**

**Chapter 7: Thoughts of a Prank**

The sound of a buzzing alarm had to be the most annoying sound in the whole world. Seriously, they could come up with a much better way of waking people up, rather than the obnoxious, loud, repetitive noise that is a "buzzing" alarm.

I awoke with a grumble, blindly reaching for my wand on the bedside table. My fumbling fingers finally found the smooth stick of wood, and I blasted my alarm into a thousand pieces.

But, it being a wizarding alarm rather than a muggle one, it repaired itself automatically and continued making its obnoxious noises.

I groaned and finally flung the covers off me. I was notorious for being most definitely NOT a morning person; everyone knew to steer clear of me at least until lunch, which was when I was in a much more agreeable mood.

Thank goodness the first day of classes was a Friday, and I wouldn't have to wake up early tomorrow.

I stumbled into the shower, thanking whatever deity was in the heavens above that I was a wizard and didn't have to wait for the water to get to the perfect temperature before getting in. In my jumbled, sleep-fogged mind, I started to attempt to decipher my emotions over Lily's date with Sirius once again, and finally gave up in disgust when, due to my inability to think in the mornings, I started reviewing the scene of Lily kissing Sirius' cheek over and over again, not progressing any further in my thoughts.

Isn't it so annoying, when your mind gets stuck on one thing in the morning, and repeats it over and over and over? It's like one of those muggle things called a record, skipping and repeating the same lyric again and again.

I willed the shower to turn cold for a few brief seconds, thinking maybe it would help clear my mind of that haze that occupied it so fully at the moment. This morning the Marauders were supposed to start finalizing plans for the first prank of the year, and I needed a clear mind to fine-tune the details.

It really wouldn't be good for the first prank of the year to backfire on us.

I finally finished getting ready, and admired myself in the mirror.

I really was one good-looking guy, tall, muscled, and crazy fly-away hair that girls seemed to not be able to resist. I smirked, and shined the Head Boy badge pinned to my robes.

Any girl would be lucky to have me.

Right?

--

I strutted into the Great Hall for breakfast, for once in a good mood in the morning. I found the Marauders in the usual spot, and Sirius greeted me with, "Oi, Jamsie! Why are you in such a good mood this morning? Ready to pull a few pranks on those nasty snakes?" He clapped me on the shoulder, and I plopped down on the bench and started grabbing food before replying.

After my plate was filled with a mountain of food, I responded to Sirius' questions. "First of all, I'm in a good mood just 'cause I'm in a good mood. And I am definitely looking forward to giving those slimy Slytherins what they have coming to them."

Sirius laughed at my first answer, and said, "But, Prongsie, you are NEVER in a good mood in the morning."

Those nicknames were starting to get annoying (which was probably what Sirius was intending, knowing him) and I decided to let him know so, "Well, Padfootsie, if you ever decided to stop adding ridiculous endings to my names, then maybe I would answer you. And I may not be in a good mood for much longer if you insist upon keeping that up."

Sirius just laughed and shook his head, then muttered under his breath, "Poor ickle Jamsie is gonna be in a weally bad mood then."

I wasn't sure whether to be even more annoyed or laugh, and I finally just chuckled, a good middle between the two.

Moony and Wormtail had been silently watching the exchange between Sirius and me, and Moony decided to bring us back to the topic of the prank before we digressed any further.

"So, should we meet in the library after classes today to find that spell to make the spell last a week?"

I let them in on what I had been considering about this prank, color combination-wise. "Okay, so I've been trying to decide whether we should make them half gold, half red, or should we do it so their skin is red and their hair is gold?"

All three of them seemed to ponder this for a moment.

"Well, when we changed their robes, we made them half red and half gold. I think we should do it a little bit different this time, and do the skin red and hair gold, like you said," Sirius said thoughtfully.

Peter just nodded his head in agreement. Really, that boy would go along with whatever we said, no matter what. I think we could tell him to jump off a cliff, and he'd do it (well, only after multiple reassurances from us).

Remus seemed to consider what Sirius had said, then put in his own thoughts. "Yeah, I think that's the way we should do it this time, but we should make it so the fingernails and toenails are turned gold, if that doesn't get into too complicated magic."

I smiled, "Great idea, Moony! I think the spell that changes their skin and hair colors mainly has to do with our mental pictures and what we want them to look like, so it shouldn't be too hard. And this year, since I'm Head Boy, I have access to the Slytherin common room and dormitories, so we can get everyone by slipping in there, rather than just getting them during a meal when everyone isn't guaranteed to be there. Imagine their faces, waking up with their skin red and hair gold!"

I started laughing loudly after my last statement, and the other boys joined in. Everyone surrounding us gave us weird looks, and started talking in hushed whispers to each other about what the prank was going to be. If the Marauders were all together and laughing as we were now, it was common knowledge that we were devising some prank or another.

We all got up at the same time, and started walking to classes, laughing all the way.

--

Classes passed quickly enough, considering that we had double potions with Slytherins. Some of them were giving us nervous looks throughout the class, having no doubt seen the display at breakfast and wondering what was going to happen to them this time.

The greasy git Snape was glaring daggers at me the whole time, and I put a thought in the back of my mind to develop a prank later this year just for him. I always got a bad feeling from that particular Slytherin, and I wasn't sure what I harbored so much hostility towards him.

The four of us walked together to Library when classes were done with for the day. We nabbed a table towards the back that was hidden from the others, and spread out to find books that could possibly hold the spell that we needed.

After a silent couple of hours of intense research, Moony announced, "Got it! Wow, it's quite simple really, it's a basic swish and flick movement, and just the words (insert Latin words here that I was unable to find) . There's a counter-spell too, so we can take it off after a week. If we just knew Latin, I swear we could come up with almost any spell we wanted. Of course there'd be the complications of different meanings, and how you would combine the directions that you wanted, and also-"

I cut him off before he could keep on going. Remus could go on forever if he got on a roll, and it was vital to stop him from his train of thought while you still could.

"Okay, so it's easy to master the spell? Should we try it out on anything first?"

Remus shook his head yes, and then performed a spell to change the color of his parchment to red, finally finishing the process with a quick flick of his wand and the permanence spell. "Try and remove the spell now."

Sirius pointed his wand at the parchment, while saying, "Finite Incantatum!" The parchment remained the Gryffindor red, and the four of us broke out in triumphant smiles.

"It works! So when are we going to put the final plan of the prank into action?" I queried.

"I think we should wait a couple of weeks. I know, I know, I'm eager to pull the prank, too, but the Slytherins are on-edge after seeing our little performance today, so I think we should let them settle down again, make it a little more unexpected, you know?" Remus replied.

He was a smart one, he was, always having the best ideas. Even though I do have an excellent school record, Remus had a better one, and the only reason I was Head Boy over him was because of a certain ailment of his.

"Excellent, excellent idea, Moony, my furry friend," Sirius said. "That is exactly what we'll do. We'll watch those little snakes every day, and just when they get comfortable again, we'll pounce! They'll never know what hit 'em."

Peter was shaking his head yes fervently, not saying a word, and I voiced my agreement with Remus' idea as well.

"Well, since our mission has been accomplished, I'm ready to eat, how about you?" Remus said with a grumbling stomach.

At that moment, Peter, Sirius, and my stomach all growled in accordance with Remus', and we set off towards the Great Hall.

--

A few hours, and several games of wizarding chess later, I was once again in my Heads' common room.

It occurred to me suddenly that I had seen very little of the Head Girl all day, and according to Aubrey and Allison, she was supposed to be in her room. But I hadn't heard a peep since I'd been back, and I thought back to the discussion between Aubrey and Allison earlier that evening.

They had been complaining to each other while I was in the Gryffindor common room tonight of how Lily seemed to be holed up all the time and how she needed to start living a little.

"After all," Aubrey had proclaimed, "it is her last year at Hogwarts. What's she doing studying all the time and going to bed early on a Saturday night?"

Allison had looked thoughtful at this last question, and said in a quiet voice, "I have a feeling she's hiding something from us, Aubs. I don't know why, and I don't know what it is, but I intend to find out." She had a determined look on her face after her last statement, and I felt a little sympathy for Lily.

After all, if Allison wanted to find something out, she normally succeeded at her task. But it did make me wonder as to what Lily could possibly be hiding. I admittedly knew very little of her compared to Aubrey and Allison, so I had no idea as to what could be going on in her life.

Maybe she had a crush or something? Maybe she'd gotten involved with a muggle boy over the summer and had gotten her heart broken? I shook my head, enough wondering about Lily and boys. It gave me an odd feeling that I still wasn't used to yet.

Maybe I could find out what she was hiding.

I was living with her, after all.

**A/N****: **Really, I was planning on writing the chapter about Lily and the club, but I forgot that I needed to do James' POV. Oh well, at least I finally updated! I'm not abandoning my story yet, so the next chapter (hopefully) shouldn't take too long to write, but don't expect it until sometime next week.


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